Here in rural Mexico the first thing that most foreigners notice is the speed bumps. Called topes, these speed bumps are everywhere. With the exception of highways, you will find them about every 100 yards, which makes for quite the bumpy ride. On our first day out in the field one of the Sistema Biobolsa technicians explained that topes are the only way to get drivers to slow down and (maybe sort of) follow the speed limits.
Ex-hacienda Chautla, one of the tranquil places we visited
Although Paul and I came to Mexico with a mission to conduct surveys and make as much progress as possible on our project, we have been forced to slow down. The end of the school year came like a whirlwind as we worked to finish our project proposal, study for exams, write final papers, move out, pack for Mexico, and try to mentally prepare for the coming two months. So as we settled into our new life in Puebla it came as a bit of a shock when at 7pm we had nothing to do. Although our days out in the field were exhausting, especially in the beginning as we adjusted to the language, altitude, and different cultural norms (i.e. eating lunch at 3 pm), we returned to the apartment each evening with no plans or obligations but to make dinner. No homework, no meetings, and no group projects. Although we have been productive and made the most of our time here, life for us in Puebla looks very different than our hectic schedules back home. In some ways, the entire time has been one giant speed bump, reminding us that we don’t always need to move through life at such a rapid pace.
I imagine that most people, like me, don’t like speed bumps very much. They often force us to slow down at an inconvenient time, and they may even cause us to bump our heads (Paul). My reaction to this newfound free time has been extremely inconsistent. Sometimes I find this slower pace refreshing. I’ve read six books in the past six weeks and I’ve had so much time to journal my thoughts. But at other times I find myself irritated by all the speed bumps. I am frustrated when we have to wait an hour to get somewhere. And sometimes I get bored just thinking about spending another evening reading. I’m constantly fighting the idea that I always need to be “productive” and not waste time.
Paul and I with Norma at the birthday party
One benefit of adopting this slower pace of life is that it allows time for the unexpected. One day when Paul and I stayed home to get some work done Norma, the woman who cleans the apartment, invited us over to her house that afternoon for her mom’s surprise birthday party. We accepted and ended up spending almost three hours there, no other commitments vying for our time. They hired a mariachi band to perform for all the guests and of course served a huge meal. We enjoyed chatting with some friends of the hostess who sat at our table and learning more about the culture of Puebla. I was once again moved by their generosity and hospitality, and it was a good reminder that oftentimes slowing down lets me say yes to new experiences and be more fully present.
The grandkids helping with the cake
I don’t have a nice way to tie this blog post together, to announce that this inner struggle has led me to a newfound peace, and that I will live the rest of my life at a beautifully balanced pace. No, I’m here to tell you that life will always be moving too fast when you want it to slow down, and vice versa. But I believe there is life in this tension between action and inaction. I believe that a purposeful life, which is often hectic and messy, can be rewarding and life-giving. I think back to some of my busiest days at Santa Clara and I feel that sense of joy and purpose that often accompanies exhaustion. But I also believe that the idea that you must be busy to be successful or happy is a lie. The time I’ve taken for myself here in Mexico has been an important period of rest and offered me space to reflect on my experiences and dream about where I want to go and who I want to be as I prepare for graduation next year. As I enter back into busy college life in September, I will welcome those crazy days with open arms, as I truly do love that life. But I will also fight it, grabbing hold of those moments of rest, and allowing life’s speed bumps to slow me down.